Monday, May 29, 2006
you kick up the leaves and the magic is losti blog for the sake of continuity.
somethings just not right with the world. caught crash over the weekend.. nothing beats a good provocative movie. and it got me thinking.. where do we draw the line over racism? racist jokes are quite common, and come on, we all have a good laugh over them. but where does humour end and malice begin? sometimes i think we dont even notice it, and it goes just beyond simple stereotyping and generalisation. like just yesterday i was waiting at the paragon-heeren traffic light.. and these maids were squeezing their way to the front of the light just as it was about to change. i glance at them and found myself rolling my eyes. and i never roll my eyes. in that split moment when i started to roll my eyes, i realised how absurd everything was. it was a 'i cant believe im doing this' moment. i guess thats how far gone we are, when we've been conditioned to a point whereby we react instinctively to our own preconceived notions of race and religion. and you wouldnt think its so pervasive in a 'multi-racial' community like singapore. but it is, we just don't realise it.
*sigh* its been that kinda weekend. long. not because its been a 4day weekend, but because i find myself looking for meaning and finding none. oh well. at least i had a good night on sunday.. i love my daifuku. and jap curry rocks my world. and sashimi. and chawanmushi. and agedashi tofu. and ocha. and aimee. =) also managed to finally (after a month of hunting) settle on a pair of nike shox. leaving me 200 bucks poorer.. quite pleased though, for even though its shopping on necessity i still end up with something i like.
oh, also caught up with caleb luke brandon mich justin on friday night.. and the first thing caleb said was 'you've shrunk, phua!'. shit. time to gym.
blah. my brain has really leaked out of my ears.
or so it seems, at 8:45 PM
Saturday, May 20, 2006
even though i post roughly every weekend, it doesnt stop the feeling that my posts are getting more and more sporadic. being in army does that to you; your idea of time is stretched and compressed all the time.. a 6 day week can't pass quite fast enough, and a oneday weekend is over in a second. yes, my saturdays are now gone. worse still, is to lose a 'long' weekend to illness. god i hate being sick.
so went to sleep on thursday feeling quite dazed. dazed by spending the whole evening reading car reviews and such, by contemplating what i really want in a car (while keeping in mind that i should count my lucky stars my family will even be getting a car). perhaps too dazed to realise i was coming down with something. woke friday morning without my voice, sounding like a frog with a sorethroat. still.. made my way down to lengkee with my parents, cos well. the sooner the whole car business is settled i can just focus on my tp coming up. well, only managed to spend 15 odd minutes at lengkee discussing with a salesman and checking out the yaris/altis before leaving.. then taking a cab straight home and crawling into bed with a fever. *sigh* what a waste of my friday morning. and infact, my whole friday spent in bed. yipee.
reprieve: bsm saved the day again. thought i could soldier on and attend NDP rehearsal on saturday... but started to really dread having to force myself out of bed and travelling all the way to khatib at 630 in the morning. couldn't find a replacement though.. (which is still really dumb.. why the hell do i need a stand-in!?!? its not like he's going to take part in the real deal) but then received a msg 'stay home and rest.' haha magic to my eyes. =) that settled, crawled back into bed again, at 1030pm. only sick people sleep at 1030 on a friday night. at least, if your'e in army, and your weekend awaits you.
interestingly enough, being sick at home with nothing to do just makes me crave for the one thing thats hardest to find: company. blah. its been 12 days since my last driving lesson, and 16 more days till my tp. wonder if i'll be able to get enough lessons in between to prepare myself.. what with NDP rehearsals forcing me to cancel all my saturday slots. yipee x2.
gotta love this life.
or so it seems, at 7:55 PM
Sunday, May 14, 2006
就算把世界给我，我还是一无所有
its been a long weekend. even with a small blip of ndp rehearsal on saturday morning, being off from thursday to sunday sure is
shiok. if only i didnt have to book in tonight.. the ord angel is hovering above my shoulder now.. just a few more months now.. :D
its like the past one and a half years of limbo has just been leading up to this finale... when we finally recognise why slavery is outlawed by the geneva convention. interestingly enough, it says that 'for the purpose of this Convention the term 'forced or compulsory labour' shall not include: (a) any work or service exacted in virtue of compulsory military service laws for work of a purely military character'. [Article 2 of the Forced Labour Convention] to me thats abit like saying 'well, by law you cant force a person to do anything, he has rights. however, what you
can do is to relinquish his rights by stating in the constitution that for 'national purposes', 'Parliament may by law provide for compulsory service' [Article 10 of the Constitution for the Republic of Singapore]. haha in short, we're fucked.
of course, this wouldnt be so bad if not for the fact that this whole notion of 'national purposes' is lost on everyone serving the army. save maybe regulars.. but then again, they volunteered. i'd admit that there probably are certain units that are important, like say ndu or commandos, or other units that actually do take part in day to day running of the country (like police, or civil defence). but then u see the ugly side of army, where there are hundreds (maybe even thousands) of young, workforce eligible men who are doing jack-shit. thats right. jack-shit. i remember something luke mentioned a while back.. 'regulars wouldn't sign on if there wasn't national service.. they'd have to do the work themselves'. makes a whole lot of sense. especially after you've been through one and a half years of it.
aiya cant be bothered to go on about this anymore. all i have to say is that you'd expect after one and a half years, to maybe understand why you have to serve in the first place, that maybe there was some purpose to it afterall, that this 2 year absence from a normal life would be justified. that you wouldn't just 'serve and fuck off'. i was wrong. 175 more days till i fuck off.
or so it seems, at 6:32 PM
Monday, May 08, 2006
ugh. somehow i find this feeling the most irritating. the half-sick feeling, like your'e kinda sick, but not really very sick. it just completely disrupts your system, neither really here nor there. being sick sure sucks, even if it is just a little bit.
anyway. realised that things havent been so smooth lately.. just been bobbing up and down following the waves of life. which doesnt say much really, except that well, the same old rhetoric. life is stale. haha how pathetic is that. is like i've come to a point in my life where everything boils down to a simple question: what do i want to do with my life. and as usual, i dont have the answer. and its not likely that this will change anytime soon. back to square one.
u can tell things aren't right when im just rambling rubbish. my involvement in NDP'06 has been confirmed.. that basically means its full on army for the next 3 odd months. full on meaning a 6-day week. and since it varies from saturday to sunday, it just disrupts everything. i guess you can talk about pride, talk about loyalty to country blahblah. but at the end of the day you realise that 1. you were volunteered 2. you've already spent 1 1/2 years of service 3. you have other priorities - such as driving 4. its really tiring spending 6 days away from home. blagh. even though i know it'll probably be worth it on the 9th of august.. its just so far away.
speaking of driving.. finally went for driving today after a 7 week hiatus.. and it was pretty good to sit in the driver's seat once more. even if i did mount kerb twice in circuit, and commit many incidents of late braking haha. it was otherwise quite relaxing.. as i hoped driving would end up being for me. one of my 'dreams' is to own a convertible and be able to cruise around and just enjoy the feeling of the wind all around you, park somewhere and enjoy the clear skies above. haha simple dreams for a simple person.
but sometimes i wonder if i'm more complicated than i make myself out to be.
or so it seems, at 8:55 PM
Monday, May 01, 2006
thats what made sunday really worthwhile.
or so it seems, at 9:27 PM
ugh i feel like i've been run over by a bus. okae maybe not really run over by a bus, because i doubt anyone could survive that. but definitely run over. or at least hit really really hard in the head by a fast moving object, not meant to decapitate but incapacitate... well. i'm really out of it thats what. sleeping at 7am and waking at 2am does not leave you feeling very fresh and alert.
didnt make a sunday post because... well i wasnt home yesterday :p had a great day out with eugene/chew/mich.. and then caught daisy with aimee, which was not too bad a show (kinda let down by the way the plot panned out though) then went to chew's house to pretty much play winning eleven till we passed out. haha which leaves me in the not-so-drunken stupor i find myself in now. and my damn handphone still can't transfer its pics to my pc... argh i need some blue tooth adapter or whatever thing. or a new usb cable. or a new laptop. or a new phone. or or... hahaha. *stretch* mmm i love south bridge road lobster hor fun. think i'll post more later.. when i've really woken up :p
or so it seems, at 2:19 PM
